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Over-sharing can be a sign of nervous anxiety, or the trait of a very open person, but no matter what the reason, it is better to censor what you tell your object of affection because the details you leave out can be more powerful than those you share.This is especially true when it comes to talking about past relationships or other people you might be dating, as it can be a real turn-off for your date to picture you with other people.Another tactic often used to play it cool is to be vague, or even secretive, however, it is much better to be authentic and drip feed details about yourself.
Others have been single for a while and worry that their thoughtful considerate approach might be interpreted as disinterest.When I write dating tips and relationship advice for a new mode, I am writing to a female audience.But neediness is not gender-specific – guys make the mistake of being “needy” too!Put simply, a needy person doesn’t feel good inside and then saddles the other person with the responsibility to make them feel better… whoops, “my battery died, sorry I didn’t call you back last night.” Nobody’s perfect. When you boil it all down, neediness is not some set of behaviors. When a person takes on the belief that another person is responsible for their happiness, their sense of well-being and their sense of self-esteem, then it’s guaranteed that they’re going to act needy as a result of that mindset.
(FYI, we have a whole chapter on this in our new book “He’s Not That Complicated: How to Crack a Man’s Romantic Code to Get the Relationship You Want“) Even the kindest, most well-meaning, most empathetic guy won’t be able to satisfy a woman who acts needy the majority of the time. I would be pretty surprised if you never had a needy guy around you. Making someone else responsible for your emotions is a key ingredient in creating a toxic relationship type dynamic, so it’s very important to guard against doing that (as well as recognize when others are doing that towards you).
People who keep themselves occupied with hobbies, classes and activities sound more cool, interesting and intriguing than those who vaguely claim to be ‘super busy’ all the time.